Resting here as this
Resting here as this, what difference does it make? As I sit here, there is awareness of profound stillness within this unknowable source of being. When thoughts arise characterizing the experience or recalling some interpretation that has seemed real to me, one of three things seems to happen. The thoughts may pass through unimpeded, just noticed and leaving no trace, like a bird through the sky. They may be recognized as thoughts and then they unravel within the vast, open sphere of conscious awareness, like a snake untying a knot in itself as it moves naturally on its way. Thirdly, thoughts may become engaged with, imbued with reality, meaning and significance.
For me this has been like boarding a train as it is pulling out of the station. Once I have climbed aboard the train of thought, I am on ’til at least the next station. More often I have gone to the end of the line before I remember that I am not a separate character in the apparent drama, I am the awareness in which the whole movie is taking place. Each such fresh remembering brings fresh peace as the chemicals of my identified state subside and I gaze into and out of the vast, mysterious emptiness which is our intrinsic awareness.
Resting here as this, there is no agenda or expectation. There is peace and a sense of well being. There is a stillness at the core of everything; this cognizant space of being pervades everything; this is the source and substance of all that appears. I thank God that this is what we all really are. Only goodness and mercy, warmth, kindness and wisdom can come from consciously abiding here.
And that is what I find. When I am with another and resting here as this, there is delight discovering a warm human connection. I find that being loves quickening the heart and mind of the one appearing over there. I find myself spontaneously saying and doing things with others that we both enjoy and feel good about.
As we awaken and get used to resting here as this, there are many things that we have misunderstood, that get rearranged and reversed in our new way of being. As we begin afresh in any moment, we start to notice that we are always here and it is always now. And so, as our attention is increasingly opened into here and now, we spend less and less of our time in projecting our ideas from the past onto present and the future.
Rather than it appearing that we move through time and space, it is recognized that time and space appear to move through this awareness of now. Wherever you are as you read this, in your own experience, you are here and it is now. In any moment of your life, if you simply look for yourself, you will notice, “I am here; it is now.” If you look for yourself as you are walking or driving, you can readily notice that what you are is actually still, right here, right now. As you notice what you are actually experiencing, the scenery is moving through your field of vision, space is passing through the awareness you are. If you are walking, in the lower periphery of your vision, you can notice the ground and your arms and legs moving. But you, yourself are still, the present, open space of awareness. When you look past the furthest stars and behold infinite space, that experience of end less space occurs within the inclusive space of awareness.
We can never leave here and now, except in an abstract imagination. When we are caught-up in our story, we have lost touch with our actual being now. We have focused all our attention into our mind’s interpretation. This happens when we react to avoid a sensation or to avoid the sensation of our estimation of a sensation’s meaning.
Look for your self. Is there not awareness of whatever you think is going on in this moment? There is an inclusive presence of awareness which is aware of your sense of your self, your sense of everything you place your attention upon, your labels, your associations of significance and thoughts and evaluations, isn’t there?
If you are aware of your sense of you, if you are aware of your story of you, which one are you? Can you possibly be a character in a story appearing in your awareness?
What is this, really? Awareness is here. Awareness includes every aspect of our lives. Every moment, every place, every other that we experience happens within the actual now of awareness. But what is this that is aware? Whenever we care to look we find nothing whatsoever and we know that nothing is found. Awareness is simply space with a capacity to know. And this nothing which includes everything that appears within it is what we most fundamentally are.
Resting here as this reveals the mystery of life, of ourselves and of one another. Resting here as this is peace beyond understanding. Resting here as this is our inevitable destiny.
Author of The Awakening West